Category: car service centre

I’ve been looking forward to this trip to Launceston all month, yet somehow I’m fine with this little roadblock. I put this down to my new headphones, which make listening to music an experience of unadulterated delight. Basically, I have something to occupy me while I wait for a towing company to take me to a mechanic.

To back up, I was barely out of Hobart when my van started making ungodly scraping noises before grinding to a halt. Luckily for me, it did so right beside a cute historic church fronted by a sunny patch of grass, which I’m now peacefully kicking back on while pumping a bit of early death metal.

I’m not concerned about getting it sorted – I’m sure I’ll be able to find somewhere good for car repairs. Brighton is not exactly out in the middle of nowhere; there are mechanics up here for sure. This whole thing is simply an invitation to kick back and enjoy some fresh country air.

If anything’s worrying me, it’s the fact that my car stereo seems to be on the blink, and I’m not sure I trust some random Brighton auto electrician to look after my baby. I know that probably sounds pretty stupid, but we’re talking the cream of in-car sound systems here. It needs the special touch of someone who deeply cares for properly balanced mids and life-transforming sub bass.

That said, I might just have to take the risk if I hope to carry on with my journey. Sadly, wearing headphones while driving is a no-go, so having functional car speakers in of the essence. I’m probably being a bit overly precious about it, anyway. It’s not like they’re going be deconstructing every little bit of it and smashing it with hammers… are they? I’m not really sure how these things work.

In the meantime, I’m going to take my mind off that mental image with some hardcore drum and bass.

Everyone can have their soaps and their other reality TV shows. Lizard’s Hut is all I really need. It’s a little more niche- much bigger in the UK, in fact- and it’s all about people bringing in their inventions, where they are ruthlessly judged and torn apart.

The open secret of the show is that no one ever actually receives funding: it’s actually just a stream of idiots filing past a group of incredibly aggressive judges, who then more kindly explain to the viewer the science behind their decisions. It’s actually very educational.

The latest inventing idiot who had their dreams crushed on international television wanted a car that could drive underwater. Now, one of the judges is a smart fellow who used to do auto electrical work in Bentleigh, just around the corner from where I live. He’s generally the one who deals with anything to do with cars, so obviously he tore the guy a new one and he ran away sobbing. We then received a very interesting lecture on why the idea wouldn’t work…obviously, auto-electrical was at the top of that list. Cars are not entirely waterproof; they can resist rain, but not being submerged. Even if you shore them up and insulate the engine against the water, there are still all kinds of issues- pressure, the exhaust, the lack of escape options in case of emergencies- that mean that an ordinary car made waterproof still isn’t going to work underwater.

So educational. Now I fully understand the deal behind why submarines are submarines, ships are ships, and cars are cars. Next time I go for a car service close to Bentleigh East, I’m going to remember this. Maybe I’ll quiz the mechanics on their opinions on aquatic cars. Hopefully they look at me like I’m the idiot, as they should.

 

My colleague Randall just got a new car. It’s so fresh off the showroom floor, you can use it as a mirror. It’s aqua coloured and kind of sparkly when the sun hits it at a certain angle. As for any details beyond that level of superficiality, don’t ask him, because he isn’t the slightest bit interested. It’s a bit disconcerting, to tell you the truth, how few shucks he gives about keeping track of the paperwork it came with – he’s already gone and misplaced the manufacturer’s logbook.

I’ve just been trying to explain to him why he needs to replace it, and that it’s the norm for people who buy new cars to have them serviced by the log book. Car servicing in the Ringwood area tends to compatible with this – my mechanic complies with it automatically – but you need the logbook in order to keep a record of it. Seems simple to me, but Randall doesn’t appear to get it. Sigh.

In addition, he told me that he’d joined the RACV, on his mother’s advice, without having any idea what it is. He doesn’t even know what the acronym stands for – he probably thinks it’s the Really Awesome Car Vroomers society or something. Anyway, I told him he should find a mechanic that does RACV-accredited servicing in Ringwood, because his membership will give him a discount. I have no doubt that he’s already forgotten that piece of info; if not, he definitely will have by the time his car is due for a service.

I just hope he’s bothered to hook up car insurance – knowing him, he’s bound to absent-mindedly leave the handbrake off at some inopportune moment. It’s just a matter of time. Anyway, there’s not much point arguing with him about it; I’m just going to make sure never to leave my car across from his in the staff car park.